Obituary of Todd James Reuer

November 14, 1960- December 22, 2013

Todd James Reuer was born on November 14, 1960 in Mobridge, SD to Rita (Lawless) Reuer and Calvin Elmer Reuer.  His love for the Dakota prairies and ranching began early on, growing up on a ranch nestled in the banks of Lake Oahe, south west of Selby SD. Todd attended grade school in Akaska, SD and then later graduated from Selby High School in 1979. In 1975 Todd went to a youth camp at a place called Outlaw Ranch outside of Custer,SD.  There at that camp Todd said that he "gave his life to Jesus Christ and asked Jesus to live through him". From that day on Jesus was not only a savior to Todd but His truest friend. His prayer for Christ to live through him is a prayer that was answered, as the love and joy of Christ was felt by all who were near to Todd throughout his life. Feeling a call to ministry, Todd attended a bible school called Shiloh Training Institute in Hamilton, MT after high school where he graduated in 1981. His love for the cowboy life did not stay behind in South Dakota, though. He took his calf roping horse to school with him so he could still rope at the local indoor arena any spare minute he had. During his time at Shiloh, he met Kelley (Shaw) from Mandan, ND. They were married on January 2, 1982 at the Presbyterian Church in Mandan. The newlyweds returned to MT as Kelley finished her school at Shiloh and Todd found a job on a ranch in Stevensville, MT. Their early years of marriage were spent helping with several church plants, singing at many events together, and working on farms and ranches in various towns in North and South Dakota. In 1983 they moved to Bowdle, SD. There, Todd worked on a ranch and Kelley and Todd both helped with a local ministry, traveling, singing, and preaching weekly. In 1984 Todd and Kelley moved to Hoven, SD and then in 1985 they moved to Bismarck and helped work at Circle C Ranch for a summer camp season. From 1985 to 89 they lived in the Hazen and Steele, ND area, helping a new church get started in each community. In January of 1988 they had their first child, Tyson. In Sept of 1989 they moved to Kenmare, ND to start and pastor a church. 

Todd loved people from all cultures and had a heart for missions. In 1989, Todd and Kelley and baby Tyson went on a mission trip to South East Asia, to teach at a couple different Bible Schools: one in Borneo and the other in Manila, Philippines. During their time in Kenmare they also took another mission trip into Mexico. They pastored the church in Kenmare for 3 years and then moved back to Todd's roots in South Dakota. For the next 15 years they lived in the Mobridge, SD area. In 1991 they had their second child Philip and in '97, a daughter Kristi.

Todd loved ranching on the rolling plains of South Dakota. He was interested in cattle management, rotational grazing practices and cattle genetics. He was an AI technician and also studied Bud Williams cattle management methods. Todd loved teaching others. He would often stop while working with his kids on the ranch to tell them about a certain type of grass, or share a life lesson found in nature. He had a love for teaching God's word and often taught at the bible school at his church in Timberlake, SD, his favorite topic to teach on was God's love. More importantly, Todd was known as a man who lived what he preached and his genuine love for others was felt by everyone around him. It was often said about him, that "he never knew a stranger".

In the summer of 2002, Todd had a horse accident and suffered a Traumatic Brain Injury. Over the next several years he struggled with recovery from the incident. In 2008 Todd and his family moved to take a different ranch job in Limon, CO and then later moved again to Kintyre, ND. Todd's Traumatic Brain Injury recovery was further complicated by a diagnosis of early Dementia and he increasingly struggled with his ability to focus and remember events. By 2011 the disease made it impossible for him to continue doing the work that he loved so much and with a heavy heart he had to quit ranching. 

Todd and Kelley moved back to the Bismarck/Mandan area, where Kelley took care of Todd while his condition continued to worsen. In the summer of 2013 Todd was placed into the hospital at Bismarck and then later moved to a long term care facility in Tioga, ND.

Always committed to go wherever He felt God called him to go, Todd had lived in over 20 houses and 11 communities over the course of his life. He spent his final 4 months at the Tioga Medical Center. On Sunday, God called Todd to move one more time and he passed away on Dec 22, 2013. 

Todd left a legacy of compassion and character. His ambition was to lead a quiet life working with his hands. Todd's final years were a struggle for him as he fought the devastating effects of dementia, but his life was a glorious victory. He touched everyone around him with his smile and genuine compassion towards others. Because of their many moves, Todd and Kelley would say that they really weren't sure where home was anymore. But that is no longer a question for Todd, as he was able to saddle up one last time and ride off into the sunset; one of God's favorite cowboys, finally.... home.    

He is preceeded in death by his father, Calvin Elmer Reuer.  He is survied by his wife Kelley, sons Tyson (Sarah) Reuer (Tulsa, OK) , Philip Reuer (Valley City, ND) , daughter Kristi Reuer (Bismarck) , Granddaughters, Kadence and Selah Reuer (Tulsa, Ok) . Mother Rita Reuer (Tea, SD) Siblings: Georgia McCool (Albuquerque, NM) , Dean Reuer (Spearfish, SD) Tamara Reuer (Rapid City, SD), Inlaws: Donald and Estella (Honey) Shaw (Mandan, ND), Sister In Laws: Dawn and Doug Diehl (Rapid City, SD) Debbie Shaw (Bismarck), Kim Shaw (Bismarck), Brother in Law: LaRue and Tracie Shaw (Bismarck, ND),  and many Aunts and Uncles and Cousins.

Celebration of the life of Todd James Reuer Information

I'm sorry for the delay of details to the time of Todd's funeral, but with Christmas, the funeral home was closed. This morning was the first we got to meet with them to discuss dates and times.

The Celebration Service of the life of Todd James Reuer will take place on Thursday, January 2, 2014 at 10:30 am at the Word of Faith Church in Bismarck ND.  (1503 East Divide Ave) 
The public viewing will be at Parkway Funeral Home in Bismarck, ND from 2-5 pm on Jan 1, 2014.  There will be a Prayer and Remembrance Service at 7 pm at Word of Faith Church on Wednesday, Jan 1, 2014.  

The Present Underneath the Tree

I sat down on the couch this morning in front of the tree, and looked down at the gifts and this is what I saw.  The poem below is what came to my heart.

Todd always called this time of year his panic season. You see gift giving was not his strong point, and in a span of three weeks, he had Christmas, our Anniversary, and my birthday.  He got off the hook this year, by moving on up to heaven.  But I think the gift of his life and love to me, will last a very long time.  Love and miss you my cowboy!

There's a  present underneath my tree

But the one to receive it is not here

He left this earth for a better place

His gifts there far greater than here.

He's in perfect health now, his mind is clear

He's speaking praises to his King

He's doing a dance around the throne

Singing "I Know my Redeemer Lives".

He's missed far more than he'll ever know

But his memory lives on in our hearts 

Till The Lord in grace will lead us home

To reunite with him in that place.

His Christmas is merry he's rejoicing indeed

With the one we all celebrate

His gifts are far greater than what we could give

Eternal life in it's fullness is his.

Todd moved on up to heaven - Dec 22, 2013

    Took this above picture of Todd a few years ago at sunset.  

 This morning at the end of the Childrens Christmas Program, I happened to reach down and touch my braclet that Todd had given me on our 25th Anniversary, I suddenly began to cry, cause he wasn't there with me.  Yah, I've had lots of moments like that lately, but none prepared me for the shock tonight about quarter to five when the Nursing Home called and said they had just taken Todd to ER.  His blood pressure had crashed, and he was breathing erratic.  The RN said that's all she knew, at the moment, Dr VJ was on his way there (or was already there, I don't remember), and she'd call me back as soon as she knew more.  At a few minutes after five,  I received a call from Dr VJ saying that he was very sorry, they had done all they could, but Todd had quit breathing when he got to the ER and then his heart stopped, and the resuscitation was unsucessful.  I believe Todd caught a glimpse of heaven and decided he wasn't coming back.  What a glorious moment for him, to meet Jesus face to face.   While he went on home, I cried in shock and pain of loosing my best friend and love of my life.  I was so thankful to have been at my parents farm at the moment of receiving the call, as we went out so Grandma and Grandpa could see Philip before all the business of Christmas set in.  

  Thank you out to Pastor Tim Davidson and Theressa Simon who came out to farm to be with us, and pray with us.

   Tyson and Sarah and girls are on the road, and were just about to Kansas City when I called with the sad news.  They decided to spend the night in Council Bluff and take off in the morning, a wise choice I believe.  Praying for safety as they make the rest of the trip here tomorrow.

     I'll post more as to when the  Celebration of Todd's life service will be, after the kids and I have made some decisions.

    Thank you to all who have poured out your love to us or just prayed for us.  I'm not sure how to  pass from being a wife to being a widow, a transition and name I never wanted to make or have.  To go from being a couple to being alone, from him being my best "pard" (partner for you uncowboy people) to me running solo. 

     But I know he's in a better place.  He's free from a body that had trapped him inside, there's no more suffereing for him.  He's truly free.  And I know this might not be too scriptural, but I wonder if Jesus and him aren't out checking the horses that Jesus will  ride in the book of Revelations.  Heaven just gained one heck of a good cowboy.  A man whose heart was always after God.  A man that had a passion for the Word of God, and loved to share God's love with everyone he met.  He never knew a stranger, and walked in love like no one else I've ever met.  You couldn't help but love him, cause he was just that kind of guy.  Todd, I love so much, and will miss you so very very much. 

This picture is from a few years ago, while we lived in Kintyre, but I love it.  Todd saw tonight something more beautiful than a ND sunrise, he looked at his Savior face to face. 

Visit with My Dad- Philip's Visit with Todd

Philip and I went up on Wednesday to see Todd and be part of the Tioga Nursing Home Christmas party.  I asked Philip to share his view on the visit and here's what he wrote.

 But here's a few pictures, and keep scrolling down for what Philip wrote.

 Philip was doing a little physical therapy with Todd, some things he had learned when he use to work in a nursing home.

 Holding his Dad's hand.  

“Every moment is a blessing”

 Visit with Dad 

(by Philip Reuer)

It has been a long time ago since I had seen my dad last. Last time I saw my dad, we were laughing and joking (even though it made no sense) and had a really good memory to end with before my adventure to Colorado Springs. In fact, an answer to prayer when I asked God for a miracle in church that morning, I believe he did answer that prayer with a blessing to see him in a joyful state and feeling the warmth of his presence, to hear that wonderful laugh. A laugh I had not heard in a long time. To gaze into his eyes and see how much he appreciated me being there. But when I saw him last Wednesday, I did not have that same feeling. It was a feeling of shock and helplessness. My dad was no longer laughing or smiling. He was staring into space like he was in a trance. At times he would have seconds of realization of alertness and would communicate a non-verbal cue of a nod, smirk, and or a faded smile. Sometimes he would release an “humph” or a “yea”. 

The man I used to dream of beating in a race now can’t walk straight without assistance. The man who used to eat my left overs, now can’t feed himself. It breaks my heart seeing him go through this. I understand that long-term nursing homes are not a pretty place but are necessary. Having worked in one, I promised myself to never go back. But now the man who shaped my roots of who I am, my dad, the man I love and is proud of, is now in the very place I hate the most. It is hard, but also a blessing. I cannot know what the next day may bring forth. I must hold on to every opportunity to remember what the people I love the most are in the moment I am with them, because that will not last forever. Although, it saddens my heart that my dad is in his own cage of entrapment of his mind, I hold onto those nods, smirks, faded smiles, “humph’s” and “yea’s”, because every moment is a blessing and is an answer to prayer.      

 Philip showing Todd the helmet he got from all the player at the AFA with all the Varsity players signatures. Very cool.

 Phil helping his Dad walk

 Todd has become very unstable and weak.  In the last few weeks he has repeatedly fallen while trying to walk or stand by himself.  For his safety, the staff has him in a wheel chair, or walking with staff members assistance.  

 Santa showed up for the Christmas party, and posed for a moment with Todd for a picture. 

Philip sitting with Todd during the gift opening. The shirt in Todd's lap was a gift from one of the CNA's.  A couple of staff members gave him gifts along with the gift I had brought him.

On Thursday all of us (Tyson, Sarah, Kadence, Selah, Philip, Kristi and I) will go up to see Todd.  God so wonderfully provided us a place to stay (a wonderful family in the Tioga Assembly of God said we could stay at their home) and another family from our Church here in Bismarck rented us a van so we could all drive up their together!  I just cried at God's outpouring of love to us.  We also received some unexpected money that will cover the gas to get there.  All I can say is God is good!!  

There has been times when I've wondered where in the world is God in all this, but there other times, I believe He's holding us all in the very palm of his hand in love and tender care.  

Merry Christmas to you all! 

(the 2013 Reuer Christmas Card)