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| Fluffy from several years ago. But I've always loved this picture of him. |
The house seemed extra quiet tonight when Quito and I walked through the door. There was no Fluffy waiting for us, hoping to escape out the door before I could catch him.
I set his empty kennel on the floor, with his empty collar and ID tag attached to the door. I felt I just can’t deal with it right now. I shed tears today, and actually surprised myself. I’m crying over a cat! Hey, don’t judge me, I’m not a cat hater, I’ve always loved the little furry critters. Fluffy was no exception. He did annoy me with his constant hair all over my furniture though. But he made up for his annoying hair, with an occasional jump into my lap, and soft purr rumbling giving me warmth on a cold winter night. I guess when ever he did jump into my lap I really enjoyed it, cause with Fluffy, it was the exception not the rule. It meant I was finally allowed into his circle of love. Even after Kristi left home, it as months before he would acknowledge I even existed. He was a one person cat. Kristi reigned supreme in his eyes and heart. When she was no longer around, he finally settled for me for a soft lap, since I was all that was left in the house.
He ruled over Quito too. It always amazed me how this maybe 9 pound cat, ruled over a 65 pound dog. If Fluffy wanted Quito’s bed, he got it, Quito got up and moved somewhere else. Does Quito realize he’s gone? Has he noticed he’s not around to pester him? I don’t think he’s noticed yet.
I stepped into my sunroom, and expected to see him lying on the freezer, watching the neighbors birds. Since the neighbor has a big bird feeder, Fluffy has enjoyed this perch all winter watching the birds, hoping to get outside and do some hunting himself.
So I again say good bye to something I love. Another empty spot in my heart. Yah, I know it was only a cat, but you just get use to him being there, and now he’s gone, it’s just another adjustment in my life again. I do want to thank Fluffy for all the mice he caught, he did his job well. He thoroughly enjoyed hunting. He was just being who he was made to be. Now, I need to follow his example and just be who I am meant to be. I don’t catch mice (thank God!) but hopefully who I am is a blessing to those around me.
By the way, Fluffy was originally named “Charcoal” because he looked like the color of charcoal. His first winter, he got ‘fluffier, and fluffier’ till we couldn’t help but call him “Fluffy”. I always hoped it didn’t hurt his male ego to be called a less than masculine name, but it so fit him.
Good bye, Fluffy, you’ll be missed greatly.
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| My last picture of Fluffy. From Sunday night. He was very sick, and kept crawling into his litter box to sleep. I guess when a cat is very ill, they'll do this. It didn't seem like a pleasant place to sleep to me though. |