Every Second Counts

    Most days, none of us think about a 'second' really mattering. We never give it a passing thought, that our 'seconds' are ticking away, other things are filling our minds. 

     I'm sure a Bull Rider is thinking long and hard about those mere 8 seconds, which I think could seem like an eternity.  But I've never ridden a bull so I don't know first hand. 

      I've watched my sons and my husband many times Calf Rope, Team Rope, etc, and a mere fraction of a second can be a win or loose situation.   I remember Tyson missing  the buckle at a couple of rodeos by a hundredth of a second, those are always hard ones to swallow. But I've never roped a calf, so I've only experienced that through watching them.

      Then there's the basketball game, when it's tied, and someone sends off a long three pointer, and everyone is holding their breath hoping it was in the air before that buzzer sounded. Swish, it goes in, and the crowd goes wild, but the referee calls it no good. I remember Mobridge loosing a Regional Tournament in a similar situation.  But I've never played basketball, so I don't know that feeling first hand, only from the stand point of a fan.

     There is those track meets, when running the hundred meter dash, a second can be a HUGE difference.  But then again, I've never run track, I've only watched it from a spectators standpoint.

      I could go on and on listing things that matter in life by a mere second.  Last week I experienced a mere second happening, that still has me shaking, and thanking God all at the same time.

     Kristi and I were returning from Montana, where she had spent the last two months, when an 'every second counts' situation occurred. We had just arrived in Bismarck, and were taking the exit to our house (Expressway Exit), when we stopped at the red light and waited our turn.  Kristi was at the drivers wheel, and I was just reading a text message, the time was 10:42 pm.  Kristi got the green light to go, glanced over at the north bound lane, and turned north towards home.  I can't say I saw a thing, I was looking down reading, Kristi said she saw it from the corner of her eye.   I didn't see anything, but I did hear it.  A whoosh sound behind us, then a screech of tires and then an explosion that was so loud, it hurt your ears.  Somewhere in that split second I looked up to see a car spinning towards us backwards, and I think I yelled to Kristi to get over, which she was in the process of doing anyway.  The spinning cars wheel hooked on the median between the highway lanes and came to a stop.  Kristi jumped out of the car after stopping and ran to the car, to see if the driver was alive.  I was staring at my cell phone, wondering in those split seconds how in the world do I make it just be a phone!!  Quit laughing, I may have only questioned for a second or two, but I just couldn't think straight.  As I finally dialed 911, and was getting out of the car, I then saw the second vehicle, pushed back up the overpass about 80 feet.  I'm trying to remain calm, but not doing a good job explaining to the 911 operator where the accident is at, I'm shaking so bad I can hardly hold on to the phone.  I finally get it straight where the accident is at, and she said help was on the way.

    Two other ladies pulled up behind us, they had been in the north bound lane waiting at the light, and had saw the whole thing.  Another man (who I called, the man in the blue shorts) also pulled up, he had been behind Kristi and I on the off ramp, but saw the guy coming when he started to go, and had stopped and backed up.   Another lady in a nurses uniform came running up, and began checking on the victims of the wreck.  The passenger in the second car was in really bad shape.  She actually got them both out of the vehicle, as their car was smoking, and she was worried about it exploding.   Those two young men, had just been sitting at the stop light waiting for it to turn green, when they were hit head on at 80 mph.  The driver kept asking, "What happened? What happened?"  I was amazed that they were all still breathing.  Airbags had been what had saved them.

   Then police began arriving, and checking on the victims, till the ambulance and fire trucks arrived with the trained professionals. And as Kristi told me later, she suddenly has a great appreciation for those emergency workers, as she had no idea what to do other than ask them if they were ok, and tell them help was on the way, I felt the same way.

   It was when the police began asking for our statements, that I over heard 'the man in the blue shorts' tell the officer, "He just missed that white car, and then hit that car sitting at the light. He was in the south bound lane, heading north, and going about 80." I got to thinking, wait a minute, we're the only white car here!!  I talked to the man in the blue shorts after the officer left, and said, did you see him almost miss us?  He said, "Yes, he just missed you."  We hadn't even seen him coming.  A second or two later, and we would be talking a different story.

    In the next couple of days, I would hear from several people, that they were praying for us on Sunday, and praying specifically for safety.  A couple of them told me they had been praying for days, as they felt something was wrong.  Oh the power of prayer!!  Never ever think that prayer is weak, or not needed.  Kristi and I both knew, someone had been praying. There was divine protection.  

   Later in the week, I was driving to the airport to pickup Philip. (He flew home for a couple of days for his birthday)  I had to drive through that intersection.  Somehow, it just seemed eerie at night to me.  I began to again thank the Lord for his divine protection.  Then I had this terrible thought; what if we had been hit?  I knew I would be dead, as it would have been a side hit for us, and no airbags will save you then.  I knew I would have died on the scene.  My thoughts went to Kristi, and thinking how awful it would be for her to loose her mother as well as her father.  I again said a prayer of thanks for our safety.  But then I heard inside me, "No, you both would gone.  But it's not your time, you're not done."

   I'm not done.  God has more for me in this life.  Someday, I will get to go to heaven, but not now, there's work to be done here.  There's life to be lived.  I'm so thankful for that!

   Even at the accident scene that night, I looked at Kristi and asked, "Did we pray today before we left? We always do, but I don't remember if we did today."  She said, "I don't know, I think we did, but I KNOW somebody did."  And God answered.  He protected. When I asked her that, I heard inside me, "I've got this."  I know it was God's way of saying to me, that He had us covered, cause someone took the time to pray.

     I still pray for the young men involved in the accident.  I do not know how they are doing, or even how I could ever find out, but I continue to pray for them. Praying God would heal any injuries that they may have.  That God would do a work in their lives.

      I am reminded again, that every second counts in our lives.  In our case that night, another second later we could be lying in coffins right now by Todd in the cemetery. But for now, God has us still alive, and still with purpose.

      I think about another phone call I got just yesterday from one of my best friends.  She was in the hospital just having gone through an emergency appendectomy, the doctors said, they didn't think her appendix would have held for another hour, and with how bad it was, if it had burst, they didn't think they could have saved her.  Maybe it was minutes, maybe it was seconds, but God was still there with her, getting her the help when she needed it, for God still has plans for my dear friend.  I pray too for her, and a quick and complete healing.  I just talked to her, and she was home and out on a walk. She said it only lasted for two and one half minutes, but she had made it that far.  That's like running a marathon after what she's been through.  

   Prayer, never take it lightly.  Your sudden 'thoughts' about a friend could be God's reminder to pray for them, they maybe in a great need right now in their lives and need someone to pray for them.  I'm SO thankful for the friends and family that prayed for Kristi and I.  They took the time, they took it serious, God answered their prayers. 

   I know every second counts, and I want every second of my life to count for God. 

the second car and emergency vehicles.

   

    

Reminiscing of a former Fourth of July, 33 years ago

     Well, today marked the first time in 33 years, that I didn't spend it with Todd.  33 years ago today, he asked me to marry him, well, actually he asked "If I wanted to marry this ole cowboy," and I told him I'd pray about it.  I did pray, and I did say yes.  That started the next 32 1/2 years of always being with my best friend.  Today, I was sourounded by family and some friends for a wonderful picnic day of visiting and eating way too much good food.  But all day, I haven't forgotten that hot 4th of July 33 years ago, when he asked me to marry him.  Todd always said, I was one of his best choices he made in life.  I tend to agree with him.  He made a good choice in me, and I made a good choice in saying yes to him.  No our lives weren't perfect, nor without struggle, but they were good.  As my cousin Sheila said to me today, in reply that I told her Todd proposed to me 33 years ago today, she said, "And they were good years."  Yes, they were Sheila, even all the struggles, cause amidst the struggles of life, there is the laughter.  Todd always laughed at my sillyness, and said I was one of the funniest persons he knew, he of course sometimes laughed at me, when I wasn't being funny too.  I was being dead serious, and he'd laugh.  He'd laugh till I'd laugh with him.   He also said I was his favorite singer, he loved to sit and listen to me sing.  I loved to sing to him and also with him. He had such a good voice. 

   But now he's not here to laugh with me or at me when I'm being goofy.  I feel the void today more than I have in a long time, maybe it's just cause it's one of those landmark days.  The first time without him...  kind of days.  

    I wish I could see him up in heaven, to see him truly set free, but my eyes can't see into that rhelm, but my heart knows he's having a good time.  So I take that in faith, that he's so glad where he's at, and he's still laughing away.  

    I miss you Todd, my ole cowboy.  I'm glad you asked me, and I'm so glad I said yes. 

   

Todd and I thirty three years ago. 

Miracle Mirror

For now we are looking in a mirror that gives only a dim (blurred) reflection [of reality as in a riddle or enigma], but then [when perfection comes] we shall see in reality and face to face! Now I know in part (imperfectly), but then I shall know and understand fully and clearly, even in the same manner as I have been fully and clearly known and understood [by God].

 (1 Corinthians 13:12 AMP)

I have this old mirror that is presently hanging in my closet above my dresser.  For right now I use it to see if the earings or necklace look 'right' when I'm getting dressed.  But this old mirror has quite the history with me.

I think I got the mirror when I was in high school.  Growing up in the old Shaw farm house, there was only one small bathroom and with seven people in the house, the bathroom could not be used to do things like fix your hair or put on makeup.  With five women in the house, it would be a major traffic jam at times, so all us girls learned to use the kitchen table to be our place to put on makeup and do our hair.  So about the time those things became important (to some extent) in my life, I got this mirror.  It's a simple round mirror with a metal frame, and wire stand.  One side is magnified the other normal reflection.

I remember taking it to college with me, and of course remained with me when Todd and I married.  I always found some use for it.  When the kids were younger and we had a popup camper, it became the camper mirror.  It was great, it could be hung on a hook when in use, and adjust it's angle and fold it up flat and store it away when it was time to pack up.

After it's popup camper days it got moved to our fifth wheel camper.  You just never know when you'll need an extra mirror. Then in June of 2011 we were hit by a tornado.  In the morning, we found our fifth wheel camper, across the road, and blowed to bits for several miles across the hay field.  It took us a couple days to clean up the mess.  Load after load of debris was hauled off to the garbage pit on the ranch.  Our boss came with the tractor to haul off the base frame to the pit.  While hauling it away, it slipped off the tractor's loader, and crashed to the ground.  When it did, my old mirror fell out of where it was tucked away at, and landed on the gravel road.  I picked it up, amazed it was unbroken.  The frame was a little bent, but other than that, it was unscathed.  How it survived through all that I don't know, cause as you know mirrors are quite easily broken.  I decided to keep it as a constant reminder that even though the storms of life can come and blow things to pieces, and cause havock in your life,  God can still protect you and keep you from being broken.  

So now it hangs in my closet, safe and secure, reminding me daily, that that reflection of who I see in the mirror, is one who God loves, one who can survive the storms, one who has been tossed about, but not broken.  I wish it would reflect someone 40 pounds lighter, but it's not magical, it's just reflects what is in front of it. It's not magical, but I still say it's a miracle mirror.  It survived somethings that should have totally destroyed it, but it's still all together.  I too, have been through some storms, that could have possibly destroyed me, but God has held me together, and kept me from being totally broken.  That's the goodness and the grace of God in action!

The Open Cupboard Door

    It's funny how things you do, or don't do, can bring back a memory good or bad.  I was cooking the other day in the kitchen (of course, where else do you cook) and I looked around and several of my kitchen cupboards doors were open.  As I went back flippin' doors shut, I suddenly remembed one of the few times Todd ever humiliated me in public.  

    We were pastoring in Kenmare at the time, and in Todd's sermon one Sunday morning, he used as an illustration (I do not remember what he was preaching about, I just remember the illustration) that there was one thing that his wife did, that drove him nuts.  She leaves cupboard doors open all the time.  I'm sure the was a chuckle around the church, but I wasn't chuckling, I was humiliated beyond words, and hurt.  Number one, he had never told me in private that this bothered him, and two, I leave cupboard doors open?  I do?  I didn't even know this was something I did consistently.

    While I'm sure no one else in the church even remembered he had said this past leaving the church doors that morning, I was crushed, and it still echos in my ears some 25 years later.  I began observing myself after that, and yes, I do leave cupboard doors open behind me, cause more likely than not, my hands are full from removing something of need from the cupboard, and I forget to go back and shut them till later.  I began after that to consciously make an effort to make sure I shut doors behind me.  Why? Cause it was something that bothered him.  And my heart was always to make him happy.  Not that I didn't have a few words with him following that service about what he had said publicly.  Not that it would have been bad, but please tell me those things first in private, so I can work them, before announcing my faults to everyone else.  He of course apologized to me when I told him how much that had hurt me.  He hadn't meant to humiliate me, and he assumed I realized I did this all the time, and how much it bothered him.  

    Well, we learned an important lesson in marriage that day.  You should never assume your spouse knows the things that irritate you, and you should never announce them from the pulpit to everyone before mentioning them in private to your spouse.  

    Was Todd in the habit of intentionally humiliating me in public.  No!  Far from him, or his heart to ever do that, nor I do it to him.  But so often we do things without even thinking, that leaves lasting effects on others.  Have I forgiven him? Of course, many years ago, when it happened, but the memory of it still echos in my thoughts every time I see an open cupboard door.

     It really got down to the problem of lack of communication.  He had never voiced his 'bother' to me, and I wasn't aware this was something I even did, nor that it bothered him so much that he would tell others.  But looking back, if this was the greatest thing I did that bothered him, I guess not much about me bothered him.  Leaving a cupboard door open is not exactly a criminal offense you know.  Do I still leave cupboard doors open?  Yah, from time to time, my hands are full, and I forget to go back, so I still do this irritating habit.  Does it bother me? yah, it actually does now, cause now it's been pointed out that I do this, and it was something that irritated him, and although he's gone now, I somehow still don't want to irritate  him.  

    Oh yes, leaving a cupboard door open wasn't half as bad as leaving a gate open to Todd.  Leave a gate open (even if you were coming right back in a few minutes) would drive him nuts.  Always shut a gate that was shut when you opened it, cause you never know what can get out while it is open.  I was never accused of doing this awful crime though, cause, I could never get a gate he had built open.  Todd built the tightest gates around, and no one except him or someone of his strength level could get them open.  So thankfully I never got accused of leaving gates open!

    So my advice is, communicate to your spouse not just your irritations, but the things you love about them.  Hopefully you can communicate the good more than the bad.  Talk to each other.  Did Todd and I communicate well?  Yah, actually we did, which was why it surprised me he said this in public, we were in the habit of telling each other things we loved and didn't love about each other all the time.  We communicated well together, not that it was perfect, as you can tell, something things slipped through the cracks. And always remember, to shut the cupboard door!