55 years of Thankfulness!

 

Me and my curly top hair that first year.

Today I turn 55, I believe every year of my life I have something to be thankful for, so I’m going to try to list, as best as I can remember what I can be thankful for in that year.

Year:

1- I was born into a good family that loved me and thought I was adorable! Yah, I was a really cute baby with a ton of curly hair! 

2- My Mom and Dad along with my three older sisters thought I was adorable and were teaching me all kinds of things.

3- Though sometimes I was naughty (what three year old isn’t) my Mom and Dad were firm in their discipline to teach me right from wrong

4- When people asked my Mom what my name was she loved to tease me and say “George” to which I would cry and say, no it’s ‘Kelley'.  Why am I thankful for that? Cause it’s a nickname that has stuck through the years and it was just a way of Mom showing her love with a playful name to me.

5- I was thankful to get to attend ‘Kindergarten’ for a few weeks at the country school house just a mile or so from my house.  My older sisters and a few neighbor kids were also there.  I’m thankful that I got younger brother this year too.

6- Every day I was thankful to sit in school at the country school and learn things from Mrs Olander, and look out those big windows to the lovely prairie and Missouri River

7- School was wonderful, and recess at the old country school was so fun. I even got to ring the bell when recess was done, what a privilege.

8- Though I was terrified to go to school in town at the big school of Lewis and Clark, kind family friends made me feel welcome, Lori Setterlund, Diane Willis, and Benji Dove all made life a little easier for me.

9- I had a wonderful teacher named Mrs Bond who so encouraged me in my art work.  I would bring her my drawings and she’d hang them on the bulletin board, like it was a work from Michelangelo.

10- Though I still didn’t understand fractions and division very well, and failed at gym class all the time, I was starting to love to write & read, for that I am thankful.

11- The best year of my life, when I met Jesus as my Lord.  I am so thankful for salvation, and the Maranatha Coffee House, that taught me so much about Jesus.

12- I started playing guitar and singing with "Sweet Love”  What a wonderful time we had singing for Jesus

13- Though Jr High can be tough, I’m thankful for my friends at the Coffee House that helped me take a stand for Jesus, even though I was made fun for it, by my classmates.

14- I was so thankful for the Fellowship of Maranatha Coffee House, and learning to lead people in worship time.

15- I was thankful to get to see more of the country when we went to Maine to see my Mom’s family who lives there. What a beautiful country we live in!  

16- I’m thankful I had fallen in love with music.  Band and Choir were my focus points of High School.  I especially was thankful for the opportunity to be going to a school that had a Marching Band that preformed at Half Time. Why else would one go to a football game?!

17- So thankful for the wonderful Choir teacher I had, Mr Franke, who always encouraged me in singing and playing guitar.  Though I’m a self taught guitarist, Mr Franke did give me a few private lessons in High School, and taught me things I don’t think I would have learned on my own.

18- So thankful for a wonderful Art teacher, that encouraged me in my art work.  Though I almost failed the sculpting section, my drawing was expanding and growing. I was also thankful that I was Student Council President.  Though I won the election by default (no one ran against me), and I was terrified every time I had to stand in front of the Student Body and speak, I’m thankful that it put the confidence in me, that I can do this, and not die in the process!-  Was so thankful to graduate with honors from High School!!

19- Thankful for my year at Moorhead State University.  I’m thankful for my life long friend (then roommate) Lisa.  Thankful for the opportunity to travel to Europe with the Choir, even though I hadn’t even made Choir (but had the Chamber Choir). Thankful I could learn music fast, as I had to learn it all in about two weeks.

20- Thankful for my summer at Circle C Ranch, that eventually lead me to going to Shiloh Training Institute in Montana. 

21- Thankful that I met and married my best friend; Todd Reuer. Life with Todd was always an adventure.  Thankful that Todd survived a terrible head-on car accident, and walked away with only a scratch. God was teaching me the power of prayer!

22- Though I missed the mountains, I was thankful to be back on the prairie in South Dakota with Todd

23- Thankful to be traveling and ministering with Wayne Buechler Evangelistic Ministry. What a great learning time!

24- Thankful to spend another summer at Circle C Ranch ministering to kids and adults and filing their hearts with the love of Jesus.  

25- Thankful for the year we spent in Steele ND, helping start the Word of Faith Church there. Such wonderful life long friends we met there.

26- Thankful for the opportunity to travel with Pastor Tim Davidson to various outreaches.  We lead worship and he preached.  Such good times we had. Thankful to have moved to Hazen to start another church there.

27- Thankful for the birth of my first child the day after my birthday! What a joy to have a son! Tyson James is truly a gift from Heaven.

28- Thankful for the opportunity to have traveled overseas to South East Asia. What a life changing trip for me.  The world is so much bigger than my little world here on the prairie. Thankful that we were able to take Tyson with, his first missionary journey, at the age of one!

29- Thankful to have the opportunity to live and pastor in Kenmare, ND and start Grace Christian Fellowship.  How we loved the wonderful people in Kenmare.

30- Thankful for the birth of my second son! Philip John what a joy you brought to our lives with all your silliness and activity.  What fun it was to raise not one, but two sons!  Was also thankful to get to travel on another mission trip to Mexico, with both the boys along. Putting missions into their hearts at an early age.

31- Thankful that I got to teach music at the Mobridge Area Christian School. What fun we had with our musicals!

32- Thankful to be able to lead worship at Family Fellowship Center in Timber Lake, SD. So thankful to work with Pastors Diana and Duane Covey for 15 years!

33- Thankful to be able to live on the ranch, and raise our boys in a ranch setting

34- Thankful that Todd survived a terrible Four Wheeler Accident.  Thankful again for prayer!

35- Thankful for the birth of my only daughter Kristi Grace! What a miracle you are!  You finally brought some lace and fluff into my life. 

36- Thankful to get work for Howard and Darlene Harrison for the next 10 years.  If I ever get to be a boss, I want to be just like them.  They taught me what it means to treat your employees right! 

37- Thankful for the chance to go to Branson MO with Auntie Kim.  She survived nine days with us all in our pop up camper.  The memories of Silver Dollar City are some of the best. 

38- Thankful for my homeschool friends. What a wonderful bunch of people. Thankful for the Oahe Area Home Educators (OAHE) group, I was able to start and lead for many years.  Though I lead it, it would have been nothing without all the other moms, who were the team support. We sure put one some fun Musicals and Plays!

39- Thankful for my stadium seat my kids gave me for Christmas, as I spent so much time on bleachers cheering on my kids at rodeos, basketball, baseball, football, and track meets. Thanks kids for saving my back and butt!

40- Thankful for each of the kids achievements on the field, arena or in the class room. My kids are awesome! 

41- Thankful that Todd survived another devastating accident, though this one left him never the same, with a Traumatic Brain Injury.  

42- Thankful that God kept us safe with so many miles we travels to ball games and rodeos.  With nothing more than one flat tire for all those years! (well, there might have been more than one flat tire come to think of it.)

43- Thankful for friends that loved to do things with me, like make cards, and scrap book. Always expanding my creative side.  My South Dakota friends are some of my best!  Love and miss them!

44- Thankful for one of my favorite family vacations we ever took.  Spent a week in the Black Hills in our little pop up camper with just Todd and the kids.  What wonderful memories.

45- Thankful that I graduated my first child from our Country Faith Home School.  He did well, and was a normal, smart kid.  

46- Thankful for Tyson to get to attend a year at Christ For the Nations in Dallas Tx, and we got to go visit him there.  What a long drive though! 

47- Thankful that we got to minister under Pastor Rick and Melanie Taylor in Limon CO.  My life was eternally  changed by the impact of them in my life.  So thankful for their friendship and support.  

48- Though saddened by the loss of Pastor Rick and daughter Bethany’s lives, I am so thankful I knew them.  This was an incredibly hard year for me.  Todd’s memory was deteriorating at a quickening pace, and we again moved across country, back to North Dakota. I’m thankful for loving parents that let us live in our horse trailer in their yard  and the kids in their house.

49- So thankful that Philip graduated from Napoleon High School and won a scholarship for football and track to college at Valley City State University! So proud of him!

50- Another incredibly hard year, as Todd was diagnosed as being in severe dementia, one of the finally stages of dementia.  I still remember walking out of the hospital with him, holding his hand in the pouring rain, and singing to him, “I’ll walk in the rain by your side…” (For Bobby by John Denver)  Again thankful that my parents took us in, and let us live with them, as Todd’s life was slipping away.

51- Thankful for my family that supported and loved me, as life was getting more and more bizarre with the effects of dementia on Todd.

52- The toughest year of my life, as it was riddled with no sleep and constant care of Todd. The year hurt more and more, as Todd went from being in the hospital and having two major seizures to nursing home care.  I am thankful for the wonderful care the Tioga Nursing Home gave him, though I felt ripped apart being so far away from him, and exhausted by the constant travel to go and see him.  But nothing prepared me for the devastating call on Dec 22, when he breathed his last breath, and went home to heaven.  I am thankful to God who gives comfort when no one else can.

53- I’m thankful to the Lord, for helping me begin to walk this road of Widowhood.  It was a year of many tears and travel, as the Lord sent me on a journey back to the places that meant a lot to Todd and I, to bring healing to my hurting heart. Thankful that Philip graduated from VCSU with honors!

54- I’m thankful for the joy of Kristi, and her graduating from our Country Faith Homeschool, and heading off to Bible College in Wyoming.  This ended 22 years of homeschooling for me, and closed another chapter in my life.  Though so tough to be all alone, I’m thankful for the new doors God has opened for me in pastoring Alive Christian Fellowship in Kenmare, ND.  

55- Brings me to today, and how thankful I am in all God has done in my life!  

As I look over my list, I see the pattern of one of the most repeated things I’m thankful for and that’s my parents.  I want to say on today, my 55th birthday, how much I love and appreciate them.  They have constantly loved me, and my family, and have always shown unbiased love to each of us “Shaw” kids.  They never played favorites, and were constant in their love and discipline.  In a world that’s riddled with divorce, my parents showed what it means to stay together, even when times are tough.  They gave such an incredible roll model for me as a wife and mother.  I’m thankful too for my siblings.  Though we’re all so different, there isn’t one of them I wouldn’t lay down my life for.  I’ve seen so many families that can’t stand their siblings, but I have to say, I love each of them deeply.  I attribute that love back to my parents again, who always kept harmony in our home.  Love you Mom and Dad, and thanks for bringing me into this world!!  

Where's Kelley?

  

Office space I made under the storage area at the Church.  Hours of sorting and cleaning, but it was well worth it!

  Did you ever search for Waldo in the 'Where’s Waldo?' books?  My daughter always thought those were so fun when she was younger, and we had one book that was a constant companion in our van for years, entertaining the kids as we put more miles on our vehicles than I care to share.

   Lately, I’ve had it asked of me several times, “So where are you now?”  and also, “Did you sell your house?”  When asked for my address lately, I’m not really sure what to give either.  So here’s the run down of where I am at the time of this writing. (Jan 12, 2016)

   I’m house-sitting for someone up in Kenmare (actually Tolley) and that’s where I’m at most of the time.  I’ve put a lot of miles on my vehicle in the last couple of months going back and forth between Kenmare and Bismarck, where, yes, I still own my home.  I did pull it from the market for right now, and 15 minutes after I pulled it off the market had a full asking price offer, but I turned it down.  My boys especially were wanting me to wait and not rush into anything.  The offer to house sit opened up right after that. I’m staying in a beautiful new farm home, enjoying wonderful sunrises, and the peace and quiet of the country. Quite a bit quieter after living between Century Avenue and I-94 for the last 2 1/2 years.  

    Quito has been with me the last month.  I’m sure we’re the only church in the state that has a dog in every service. So far so good.  He actually seems to have his own ‘ministry’ and often goes up to someone who is hurting, and lays his head in their lap.  So far everyone has been ok with it.  The first Sunday in church, I thought he might be bothering someone, and I said to him, “Quito. Come. Sit. Stay.”  He came and sat at my feet as I began to preach.  I looked at everyone then said, “I bet that’s not the normal words out of a pastors mouth on a Sunday morning, but maybe it should be.”  Everyone had a chuckle on that one.  Maybe more of us need to “Come, Sit and Stay” especially at the feet of Jesus.

    For now, since I don’t have an address here, I’m using the Church’s PO Box for an address.  But then again, everyone living in Kenmare has a PO Box, as there is no home delivery available within city limits.  

    I’ve been very busy adjusting to the life of a pastor.  Which not only involves learning to hear from God and give a sermon, but how to mop floors and scrub toilets, which I am already quite skilled at, having years of training in that area.  It’s listening to people pour out their hurts and pains, and you just want to cry with them, but also give them hope that through Christ there is an answer.  

   So through all the adjustments and even the constant traveling back and forth, and not living in my own home, I have to say, Life is good, cause God is good!  I’m still in a time of ‘living limbo’ but I know that too is also temporary.  

   If you can’t find me, just look for Quito, I’m sure I’m close by.  

Putting Away

    Yesterday I spent most of my afternoon, at the church, cleaning up after our New Years Eve Celebration, and putting away the Christmas Tree.  It’s always a little sad to me to put away the Christmas decorations each year.  For a brief month or so, they brighten up our lives in the dull of winter up here in the north.  In my home, I’ve gone to having lots of snowman decorations, so I can keep them up for a few more months till I’m so sick of winter (which is most of the time) and can almost taste spring. 

    There’s also the let down of all the planning and preparing for the ‘big day’ of Christmas, and then it’s over. One can look into the bleakness of January (at least it’s bleak- weather wise- in the north) and wonder what’s next?  No more twinkly lights, no more shopping and wrapping presents, and no more Christmas goodies that can make us gain a pound or two or three...

   Todd and I chose to keep the celebration going for a least one more week, as we married on January 2.  We kept the party rolling.  Then two years ago, there was a different kind of celebration on January 2, as we celebrated the life of Todd, and said good bye.  The days of celebrating our wedding anniversary were over. Oh, I can still celebrate the marriage we had, but I can’t celebrate it with him. Only the memories of a loved one  that’s gone, no longer tangible to touch, hold and hug.  So it’s now a ‘holiday’ I have to put away. 

  In I Timothy 1:19 it says, "Holding faith, and a good conscience; which some having put away concerning faith have made shipwreck.”  The one thing in life you do not want to put away, is your faith and a good conscience.  Those are to be held on to tightly so you don’t shipwreck your life!  

   Have you ever noticed, you can tear down things much quicker than putting them up?  It takes way longer to decorate the Christmas tree, than it does to tear it all down.  One must thoughtfully plan and think about where you want to place every decoration.  But in putting it away, it’s a quick process, that takes little thought and planning.

   But there is some things the Bible tells us to put away from our lives.  In Ephesians 4:31-32 it says, "Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice. And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."

  So let’s put away our anger, bitterness, wrath, evil speaking and the such and put on kindness, tenderheartedness, and forgiveness in this new year.  Let 2016 be decorated with love and joy all year long.

   I have put away the Christmas tree, but I have put on new life in Christ, that’s decorated with his love, peace, joy and grace.  Happy New Year to you all!

   Just for fun, I’d thought I’d add this picture a friend of mine sent me while I was cleaning up at the Church. I thought it was quite fitting in lieu of what I was doing at the moment.  

   

Treasure in a Cardboard Box

   

    Tonight I was going through the last two boxes that I never unpacked when I moved to this house over two years ago. I had opened them, but had never really gone through them and sorted out the stuff in it. Why I was doing this, I'll explain later.  

         I found a treasure of great price.  Not in monetarily value, but the kind of value that's valuable for my heart.  A note from Todd.  

 

    This is when he could still write a little bit, but you can also see, it wasn't flowing normal.  Somehow this note reminded me of the scripture in Hebrews 12:1 “Therefore, since we also have such a large cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us lay aside every weight and the sin that so easily ensnares us. Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us," HCSB‬‬

   I felt like he was cheering me on from that great cloud of witnesses, and saying, "Kelley, you have so much in you, you're an awesome person.  Go, Kelley, go!  You can do this!" 

    This is such timely encouragement, as I'm making a major life change, of location and occupation.

    You see, I was sorting through the boxes, cause I'm getting ready to start packing boxes, and moving again.  Not to totally unknown territory, but instead, back to a place that Todd and I both loved a lot, to finish what we started a long time ago.  Though, by now, I'm starting all over again, and this time without him by my side.

     This coming Saturday, Nov 14, 2015 would have been Todd's 55th birthday, the next day, I will become pastor of Alive Christian Fellowship in Kenmare, North Dakota.  Maybe it's a birthday present to him? Fulfilling the call on our lives, which now rests on my shoulders alone.  I think finding this note, was a sweet way of knowing he's cheering me on from above saying, "Kelley you can do this!  You have a lot in you.  You are an awesome person."   

    It's kind of scary venturing out on this adventure on my own.  But then again, I'm not alone, for Jesus has said he'd never leave me nor forsake me.  Recently my four year old grand-daughter said to me, "I'm not scared of my fears." She was referring to her bad dream she had had.  But her statement is profound, and full of wisdom beyond her little four year old mind would know.  I'm agreeing with her, and saying too, "I'm not scared of my fears."   If you're scared to do something, you know God wants you to do, well then just do it scared!  The fears will fade in the face of faith.

     So I am putting my lovely home up for sale, and will begin searching for housing in Kenmare too. Putting on the mantle of pastor, which I have never done alone, and moving away from family and the comforts of familiar.  The Adventures of Todd and Kelley ended when Todd moved to heaven, but the Adventures of Kelley and Jesus are just beginning.   Let the race begin!